I am in a mood!
This morning my husband said to me something about me having "a pirate's ransom of emotions." I quickly countered. I told him he was "blissfully free of the ravages of intelligence."
Actually, I've been feeling "blissfully free of the ravages of intelligence".
The truth is, I feel dumb. That's right....dumb. I have friends who went to seminary or Nazarene schools. Their knowledge of the Bible is amazing or they just know big words. They talk about the alumni.
Me? I graduated from high school....just barely. I took a couple of college classes back in the 70's. One was shorthand and the other was typing. I did ace them both and had a 3.60 average. Truth is....I don't think shorthand exists anymore and typing is now called "keyboarding". So alot of good it has done me.
I went to beauty school. I did finish. It took me three times to pass my state boards. But I hate doing hair. I finished school because my father said I wouldn't. (I never finished anything).
So here I am. I'm 52 and dumb.
I'm not writing this to let the world know what an idiot I am. I'm just feeling very insecure about my future. I also feel insecure about my relationships with people. I've heard people make very unpleasant and insulting remarks about people who do not have a college degree. And I have sat there fuming, but unable to think of anything to say that would sound....(oh dear God).....intelligent.
I feel like....if these people knew how uneducated I was....would they still be my friends? Or would they think less of me? I really think they would ( think les of me). I've heard how they talk about uneducated people.
There is a glimmer of hope here. I heard in church recently (and I knew this, but it just never clicked) that Jesus's apostles were uneducated men and look at the impact they made on this world. They were lousy, stinkin' fishermen. At least that is what people probably thought about them. They didn't know the Torah.
I wish I could remember that little piece of information when certain people are going on and on about how unproductive a person is unless they have a degree. But then again, the person I'm thinking of really would care less about the apostles.
I guess I just needed to write and, lucky you, you get to read about it.
I wouldn't mind going to school now. I'm still not sure what I want to be when I grow up and financially it would be impossible. I just think that now, at the age I'm at, I could sit and focus and not be thinking about the guy two rows over or where my friends and I are going tonight. I really wasn't ready for school, back in the day. I think I am now.
Great. Just a few years shy of retirement. (sigh)
Contento Reunion 2009
14 years ago
5 comments:
Oh! You make me so mad I could spit! (I'm not sure that spitting constitutes an oath, but if it isn't, it should be.)
In any case, education does not (underline that part - not not not)make you smart. Education makes you educated! Check out the people who have turned this country upside down, and you will find they are all highly educated. You have humor and a kind of left-handed grace that's charming. Your posts express wisdom and curiousity. As for age, you are still in the prime "babe" class. From the first time I found your blog, I considered you my friend, and I don't pick my friends lightly. So are we straight on that? Or am I gonna have to track you down and talk to you like a Dutch uncle? (Whatever that means.)
Jack
Thanks, Jack, for the encouragement. I appreciate it!
Carla, Carla... I find you one of the most facinating people to be around that I know. You have continued to grow and to educate yourself without getting bogged down in the world of professors and class schedules.... They have their place, but they are not the be all and end all of education. You just need to stop listening to those people who seem to indicate that you aren't worth as much or can't do as much without that piece of paper. I know we've talked about how I too struggle with self-esteem and feeling like I can't do what I might like to do. We have to find some way to begin believing about ourselves what God already believes about us. God has given you amazing gifts. Other people see it. I hope you can too.
Awwwww, shucks! Thasnks!
You are NOT DUMB>>>>>>you have the mind of Christ! I know I think the same way as you do- the only way to success is education..BECAUSE that is what we are Told by some persons!!!!and their reasoning is they were told the only way to success is an education.. I am thinking about President Lincoln as this is the month to remember him..I know you have read as many books as he did...you should run for office...I went back to college under continuing Education and found out sitting in math, english and soc. classes were wasting my time. I can add, subtract, multiply and divide, I can read and write and some americans cannot do that..Especially the new college grads- becausethey have no EXPERIENCE in how to use these in Life.. you and I do!!! How much college does it take to witness about the greatness of our Lord Jesus Christ? Make a call to a friend in need, feed you family with those great recipes, and have a personality that sparkles, you vixen you...I know some of the College People at the palce you work. And they are not a better person because of that.. what they do every day for the lord is all that counts anyway..So we shall raise our chins up high and do the will of the Lord daily with a thankful heart knowing HE LOVES UP_ HE HONORS US AND HE IS ALL WE NEED. itjuzme
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